Being jointly aware about how relationships develop gives you a chance at dedicated love, and you can both relax and explore on the way.
It takes time to reach the point of commitment. Too many jump into commitment too early. It causes heartbreak and disappointment.
Have you ever done that? Just like a fairy tale with a first date and then living happily every after? It’s a fairy tale! The actual world is that love takes time. Take each of the 3 stages to get there.
Stage One – First Dates
What is very preliminary.
It’s not time yet to be considering a possible future together, just checking out the other, and seeing if you are interested enough for future dates.
Link chemistry’s physical, emotional, and spiritual. The physical is often obvious… do you discover the individual physically attractive? Would you like the eyes, mouth, body type?
How can the person smell to you? What about the sense of touch when you shake hands or even kiss?
If a person smells or tastes of smoke, is a game-changer for you? Some things will never change. Some things will or can change over time, but right now you’re at the stage of first impressions through the five senses.
There’s also the emotional and spiritual connection that is part of early chemistry discovery. How’s the conversation? Can you share similar interests and life views?
Stage Two is the Honeymoon
It’s something many couples work to keep aspects of later in their own relationships.
You see one another frequently. You have a good deal of fun and excitement together as you get to really know one another.
The honeymoon can last for a few months, or up to a year. It ends as you get to recognize the humanity of your partner. Your partner has flaws, and you start to see them. And they yours.
For some, the honeymoon is all they need. They have a type of addiction to the thrill of their honeymoon.
They break up and move on as the honeymoon phase matures to its close. I call these people 90-Day Wonders.
They’re terrific for a honeymoon, but lack the emotional stability and maturity to pursue a long-term relationship.
Once the honeymoon with the rose-colored eyeglasses is ending, and you see one another’s lack of devotion, you might attempt to change one another.
You may struggle over who’s and who is wrong in situations, beliefs, and attitudes. This is a power struggle.
If you can get to the point where you accept one another as you are, rather than attempt to alter perceived imperfections, many relationships become stronger and endure.
Otherwise, breakup can happen, or, often worse, staying together and being miserable.
If the decision’s to take your spouse, and vice-versa, the relationship can continue and grow in a wholesome way. You’ve given one another a chance at finding love.
Are you interested in living your life intentionally to create the life you want to lead? Research indicates that using creative mindfulness is the way to Design the Life You Desire.
A big part of the life we want is a Love Relationship.